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Wedded in Scandal by Jade Lee

book review April 2, 2013 Leave a comment

I’m always ready to wade through a new-to-me author’s back catalogue. Jade Lee has favourable-ish reviews on Amazon/Good Reads and Wedded in Scandal was $1.99 on Amazon. That is definitely my preferred price for a potentially disposable historical romance novel. Given the size of Lee’s output, if all goes well, I’ll have new reading material for several weeks.

1. What do I expect from the “historical” elements in these novels?

Distance for escapism, proximity for familiarity.

Obviously, these books are not realistic. Historical accuracy is what Jane Austen is for. I read exclusively 19th century English set novels because I feel like I know something of the way of life at the time, I think I know about the clothing, and there is just enough modernity to make it feel familiar. Just far enough in the past to make it feel distant and separate, and not so long past that my brain is screaming “unclean”, as I do with medieval romances, or “so cold” as I do with the Highland settings. Big historical details can draw the eye towards inaccuracies and undermine the author’s work. Little details give authenticity and create space for the author to subvert authentic historical representations, i.e. put a bonnet on modern sexual and social mores. I believe Wedded in Scandal to be set in the 19th century based on –

the cover art
the presence of horse-drawn carriages
the absence of electricity
the theory that if it was the 18th century, people would be wearing wigs

I did not base my conclusion on any details from the book. There were none to draw on. No useful details, no historical references, and, maybe I missed it, no date at the beginning of Chapter One as is industry standard. There was a cursory class warfare theme, but that’s hardly period specific. Perhaps they are living off the grid, but I’m going with 19th century.

Continue reading →

Tempting Fortune and Devilish by Jo Beverly

book review March 27, 2013 Leave a comment

Caveat: This review discusses sexual assault.

I don’t finish every romance I start. Sometimes, I sort of dance through them, open-minded when I begin, I may lose interest and jump around a bit to see if it can catch my fancy. Sometimes it does, and I go back and read everything. Sometimes, I give up and add those to the reject pile on The (Shameful) Tally. For this review, I am smushing together two failed attempts from Jo Beverly’s Georgian “Malloren” series which is famous for the presence of a classic hero. Based around a sibling group, Beverly saved the most forbidding brother, Rothgar, for last. I’ve read series like this before. Sometimes with great results, sometimes with very bad results indeed, although the bad results make the review a lot of fun to write.

So popular was the Rothgar character, there is a phrase I started to hear in the romance subculture referring to the anticipation of a specific hero’s book, “I’m waiting for Rothgar”. Julie Anne Long is currently building the same anticipation for Lyon Redmond and Olivia Eversea in her Pennyroyal Green series. I suspect that readers who discovered Courtney Milan before I did, felt the same way about the delicious Smite Turner. I didn’t have to wait for Rothgar. He arrived at my local library thirteen years ago and has been sitting on the shelf ever since. In hardcover, no less, which is an honour accorded very few romance titles. Most of them are set up on spinners (over in a corner away from the “real” books in my library’s case) and cleared out to make way for fresh content on a regular basis.

Since I’m not waiting for Rothgar, but rather a decent author to publish something new, I decided to read other books in the series leading up to his story. I found book 2, Tempting Fortune, on the romance spinner and started with that. I didn’t get very far.

One of the things my husband objects to about romance is his perception that the heroes are aggressive and domineering towards the heroines. Originally published in 1995, Tempting Fortune begins with Bryght Malloren breaking into a home to steal some papers. He encounters an armed house guest, Portia, who tries to stop him. She tries to shoot him, he throws her to the ground to throw off her aim and then lies on top of her, restrains her, and kisses her as a “forfeit”. She’s surprised to find that she doesn’t exactly mind and feels safe with and attracted to him. [RECORD NEEDLE SCRATCH] This is EXACTLY what Mr. Julien was talking about, and EXACTLY where the book lost me. I don’t care if Adonis himself is standing in front of you: the stranger invading your home is not attractive, especially when he is pinning you to the floor. I danced ahead to see what else happens and found a scene that was even more off-putting, and then skipped ahead a couple more times, jumping to the end.

Giving up on Tempting Fortune meant I’d finished “delaying for Rothgar” and I could start Devilish. I didn’t have high hopes given the sexual power dynamics of the second book and I was thus able to avoid disappointment. He has an intense back story I won’t bother with here, but the result is that the Marquess of Rothgar is pure romance novel Alpha male: Quick with a blade or a quip, arrogant, rich as Croesus, he has the king’s ear, and, of course, he meets his match in Diana, Countess Arradale. But it’s also 1743, so while Rothgar is not effete, he is betimes bejeweled, bewigged, bepowdered, and wearing extremely dandified clothing, including high heels. My twenty-first century brain cannot process any of that as masculine and I really like emphatically masculine heroes in romance novels.

Devilish, or the portions I read at any rate, is blessedly free from the “forfeits” of Tempting Fortune, but there was an extremely distressing series of events in which Diana is verbally, physically and sexually abused, tied to a bed, her clothing cut off, and then gets rescued seconds before being raped. Now, there are books for every taste and proclivity in this genre, but I’m not talking about a sexual fantasy. Diana is violently assaulted by the villain. It is an attempted rape as a plot point. I hate attempted rape as a plot point. It’s one thing to have things getting a little dicey before the hero quickly swoops in, it is quite another to spend a protracted period on an assault and lead up to a terrifying violation. In her defense, I do think Beverly showed sensitivity and complexity in the characters’ reactions, but it was all way too much for me, and they moved on far too quickly: “I’m traumatized, I’m going to reenact my trauma to claim it and my body as my own, okay, I’m fine now.” The stories in these books are by their very nature unrealistic, but the emotional life of the characters has to feel real for the novels to have any true weight. Devilish managed to have simultaneously too much and too little emotional life, and, dear God, I never want to read a scene like that ever again ~~in a romance novel~~.

Winning the Wallflower by Eloisa James

book review March 20, 2013 Leave a comment

I don’t like short stories because they are too short, but I do like romance novellas because the length focuses the plot quite nicely and frees it up from all those extraneous elements (spies, machinations, supporting characters) that usually annoy me. Winning the Wallflower is just such a novella, but all I can really tell you about it is that it is by Eloisa James, an author I have previously rejected. Also, it was 99 cents. It may have been reasonably bantery and enjoyable. I’m not really sure because…

I decided to watch Archer while working from home this week. A lot of Archer. Twenty-three episodes (and counting) in three days, so when I read Winning the Wallflower everyone sounded like Sterling Archer: the hero, the heroine, the heroine’s friend, the omniscient narrator. As did my emails for work. It made for an interesting tonal shift, although with the vaguely florid romance writing style it did work strangely well. Not so much for the emails at work. A lot of careful proofreading required there. Plus the hero, Cyrus (I know, but I have to admit that I think Cyrus is actually a pretty cool name.), looks like Sterling Archer, if Archer weren’t a 21st century spy cartoon character and Cyrus wasn’t a fictional Regency Adonis.

At the beginning of Winning the Wallflower, Cyrus (You think it’s cool, too. I won’t tell.) and a lovely young woman named Lucy, are engaged. She has recently come into an inheritance and is being forced to jilt his untitled tush so she can marry someone more suited to her newly be-lucred station. Lucy doesn’t know Cyrus, he has barely spoken to her despite the whole proposal thing, but she is very warm for his form because he is totally gorgeous. In the process of throwing him over, Lucy finds her strength and Cyrus discovers that, what?!, she’s actually charming and smart and speaks honestly to him. Not too shabby for a woman he proposed to because she fit into his master plan to rebuild his family’s reputation *cough* cursory revenge plot *cough*. So, she dumps him, he realises he’s an ass, and sets out to woo her. Quickly. It’s a novella.

The (Shameful) Tally

Highland Surrender by Tracy Brogan

book review March 11, 2013 Leave a comment

Highland Surrender* is a historical romance novel set in the Scottish Lowlands in the 16th century. At one point, the heroine reaches up to undo a button at the hero’s collar. Did they even have buttons in 1537? To the Googles!

My search results included a partial topic listing for “button” on Wikipedia, including –

Buttons in museums and galleries
Early button history
Buttons in politics

How tantalizing!

Some museums and art galleries hold culturally, historically, politically, and/or artistically significant buttons in their collections. The Victoria & Albert Museum has many buttons, particularly in its jewellery collection, as does the Smithsonian Institution.

The list of potential button relevance is giving me life. I would TOTALLY go through all of the button drawers at the V&A. I looked through all the drawers of lace when I had the chance.

Functional buttons with buttonholes for fastening or closing clothes appeared first in Germany in the 13th century. They soon became widespread with the rise of snug-fitting garments in 13th- and 14th-century Europe.

Okay, Tracy Brogan. You win this round, but button knowledge, or no, your figures of speech leave a lot to be desired. I bookmarked some for just such an occasion:

But the morning dawned soft and fair, mild as a Highland calf (PAGE ONE!)
Her pulse thrummed, like the flap of a thousand swans leaving the surface of a loch.
Press this issue further and you’ll find yourself in a storm of regret. (That one was pretty cool.)
Questions crashed inside Myles’s mind, clattering like hooves against a cobbled street.
Mild relief tapped Myles upon the shoulder.
…the gaze of his familiar sapphire eyes pierced through her, splintering her lungs like shards of glass

To be honest, and fair, this book was simply not my cup of tea: wrong era, wrong setting, wrong subplot. I can see how, if it was to one’s tastes, this would be a fun read. The off-putting elements would have been fine with me in a story I was interested in. The writing in romance novels is often exactly this overwrought. Yes, even in the “good” ones. If the characters and story are truly compelling, the reader can/will overlook a multitude of sins *cough*Outlander *cough*. I’m not the audience for this book, and as genre fiction is so readership specific, I should probably keep my big, condescending mouth shut. Highland Surrender has averaged 4.3/5 stars from over 300 reviews on Amazon. It’s a pretty impressive score and likely a safe indicator of quality (violently skewed for the genre), if you are looking for a political intrigue Scottish renaissance romance.

*Not to be confused with Highland Obsession, Highland Legacy, Highland Quest, Highland Vengeance, Highland Betrayal, Highland Defiance, Highland Rescue, Highland Rake, Highland Heart, Highland Healer, Highland Destiny, My Highland Love, A Highland Home, Highland Sons, The Highlander, Highlander Ever After, Highland Ever After, Sins of the Highlander, Highlander’s Captive, The Highlander’s Hope, The Highlander Takes a Wife, or the other books called Highland Surrender.

The (Shameful) Tally

Undone by Lila DiPasqua

book review March 4, 2013 1 Comment

Awful. God awful. By turns gross and offensive. Also? Horrible.

I wasn’t hopeful going in because Undone, by Lila DiPasqua, was subtitled ” A Fiery Tale”. Punny titles/sub-titles aren’t really indicative of anything more than publishers patronizing their readership, so I decided to give it a chance. Undone was billed as “erotic” which can mean:

Nothing. It is a misnomer, they are trying to move product.
More sex than the average romance novel.
The usual amount of sex, but more graphic in its depiction.
For want of a better term, more creative sex.
Off-putting sex masquerading as eroticism.

In this case the answer was, of course, number 5. The book is neither romantic, nor erotic, so 0 for 2.

Set in the 17th century, Simon Bname leaves his carriage to deal manfully with some ruffians and encounters a nun sneaking back to her convent. Angelica literally runs into him and knocks him over; nonetheless, having had his recently threatened and assaulted prostrate form landed on, and seeing a glimpse of be-wimpled face, Simon is totally turned on and follows Angelica into the convent. Then he brings her out of the convent because they are so mean to her! They sail away; sex scenes take place containing WORDS THAT NO ROMANCE NOVEL SHOULD EVER CONTAIN, “FIERY” OR NOT, AND A SENTIMENT THAT LESS THAN FOUR WOMEN HAVE EVER EXPRESSED IN THE ENTIRE HISTORY OF SEX; time is spent on a Caribbean island; more SEX; they are separated; deus ex machinations™ ensue; evil-doers are brought to justice; they get married.

Simon saves Angelica, he pursues her, his interior monologue goes on and on about how beautiful (and on) and sexually attractive (and on) he finds her. They finally consummate their relationship and his first post coital thought is, “Hold the phone! Where’s the blood?”. Simon, renowned rake/slattern, is irate with Angelica (and on) for not being a virgin, so he proceeds to treat her abominably. He doesn’t even talk to her about it. Obviously, she is a liar (and on) and a faithless jade. Obviously, he is mistaken because this is one of those books where her so-called virtue is important (and on), and his is not. Madonna/Whore Complex, Table for Simon!

I don’t like romance novels set in the 17th or 18th centuries. Not even the well-written ones which this, and I cannot emphasize this enough, is not. I keep thinking “unclean, UNCLEAN!” when it comes to day-to-day life. I could give a toss about political machinations that affect the top 0.1% while everyone else is scrabbling against poverty and disease. (Medieval settings take these sentiments and multiply them by 10 to the power of 4 times infinity for the subjugation of women.) Moreover, this is the admittedly shallow part, but this is escapist reading so the judges will allow it: I don’t like men’s 17th century clothing and I hate 18th century men’s formal dress. Regardless of scintillating political intrigue, the ornateness of the clothing for both periods jars with my 21st century notions of manliness and diminishes the reading experience. No one looks testosteriffic in a heavily embroidered saffron waistcoat, turquoise pantaloons, and a powdered wig. Nobody.

Links to my other reviews can be found on my complete reading list of books sorted by author or Author Commentary & The Tallies Shameful.

When You Give a Duke a Diamond by Shana Galen

book review March 4, 2013 Leave a comment

I would love to start a proofreading/editing service for historical romance novelists. I’d hold the author’s hand and say things like, “It’s not really appropriate for the hero and heroine to get randy in the home of his recently deceased fiancée, especially as they are searching said home for clues as to her violent demise. It may come across as insensitive.”

When You Give a Duke a Diamond was like the movie The Return of the King: It had several endings starting about 70% of the way through, and then somehow managed to keep going via deus ex machinations and unnecessary complications. Also, that title is truly appalling.

The Plot: Will is an uptight Duke. Juliette is a famous courtesan. Something with murder and spies.

In addition to wanting to offer my services as an editor, I often read these books thinking an author has potential. Then I look her up on Amazon, discover she has published many novels, in this case eleven, and realise that this is as good as it’s going to get. Since Shana Galen is not paying me to be nice about it, here is what is wrong with this book:

It is a little too busy establishing its subplots.
There are too many subplots.
Will is “tired of fighting it”? It’s been, like, 37 hours.
Everyone is crazy beautiful.
The aforementioned excess of endings.
It needs more banter.
No one gets back and forth between London and Yorkshire that easily by carriage. This time would be well spent having Will and Juliette get to know each other (in the non-biblical sense).
Any romance that includes “Prinny” is instantly on notice. This is, admittedly, a personal issue.
JESUS CHRIST! TWO MURDERED DOGS?!

Here is what is right with this book:

The moments of tenderness are actually rather sweet.
The eruptions of violence are shocking and frightening.
There are some really fun touches of humour.
The hero must accept the heroine’s past as in no way indicative of her value, or morality, as a human being before his suit is even considered.
A particularly harrowing and thrilling triumph over one of the villains, even if his presence was deus ex machinations.

I might read more by Shana Galen, if the price is right: $1.99 or less/free from the library.

NEXT!

The Lion’s Lady by Julie Garwood

book review March 4, 2013 Leave a comment

This time, I’m kicking it old school…

I went through a romance genre phase after I graduated from university in 1990. I don’t think I read a so-called real book for about two years. My boyfriend at the time was ENDLESSLY horrified by my choices. Then, I woke up one day and went to the library for works by the Algonquin Round Table. That kind of awakening hasn’t happened so far, and as I’ve read what I believe to be everything good currently out there, I decided to go back and read an author from my last genre episode.

In the early 1990s, Julie Garwood was the best writer of historical fiction and, according to Wikipedia anyway, I can congratulate myself on my excellent taste as she was apparently important to the genre for introducing quirkier heroines and the use of humour. I read most of her historical output, and during my romance novel cleanse, her book The Gift was one of only two I kept. It was also the first thing I picked up when the current fever set in.

Here, in a nutshell, is Julie Garwood’s The Lion’s Lady:

Christina, is young, not quite 19, and bee-yu-ti-ful. As with all Garwood heroines, she has a sprinkle of freckles across her nose. Her mother fled an abusive marriage to a non-determinate European royal before dying and passing on her child to be raised by — wait for it — the Lakota Sioux. After a year of “Acting English” training, Christina has arrived in London to help her (villan alert!) aunt claim Christina’s inheritance before disappearing back to the Lakota. Oh, and her evil father is skulking in the wings twirling his moustache because of a subplot about stolen jewels. As Christina is Blondey-Blonde von Blondersen, I remember wondering in 1992, and again this time, why her skin apparently has no sun damage from 16 years living on the plains. Did her adoptive mother make her wear a bonnet?

The hero, the Marquis of Lyonwood (Lyon), is thirty-ish, the size of a door, very male, also patient.

I would describe this book as fluffy. The subplots are dead serious, but the love story is approached with lightness and whimsy. There is a playfulness to the writing which is quite charming. The love scenes were considered quite graphic at the time. They would still qualify as fairly explicit, but have nothing on what one can find today depending on one’s tastes. Last year, when I read my first romance with anatomically correct terms (The Devil in Winter) my eyebrows made it halfway up my skull.

I won’t be seeking out any more Garwood. The genre has developed since the early 1990s, and I have little patience for impossibly beautiful leads and a borderline creepy age difference. My recollection of the books at the time was that all the heroines were very young, chaste, beautiful Victims of Circumstance, and I greatly prefer the more mature Wallflower heroines that proliferate today.

(The other book I have kept all these years was Vows by LaVyrle Spencer. She was well-regarded in the genre for writing “real people” historical romances set in the United States in varying time periods. Spencer retired in the late 1990s, but her entire back catalogue is available for e-readers. Julie Garwood transitioned to contemporary hardcover romance and thrillers and is still publishing today.)

With This Ring Series: Reforming a Rake, Meet Me at Midnight, and A Matter of Scandal by Suzanne Enoch

book review February 21, 2013 Leave a comment

More B+ romance from an author I go to in a pinch and only if the price is right. Suzanne Enoch is almost really good. Her romances leave something to be desired, but I can never quite put my finger on what. It may be that she’s not good at conveying passion, or maybe intimacy, or even besottedness. Love beyond the initial attraction? I’m still trying to puzzle it out.

Reforming a Rake

Amazon is giving a publication date of 2009, but the cover art tells a different story:

Despite appearances to the contrary, the hero is not Kevin Sorbo of Hercules: The Legendary Journeys.

Lucien Balfour, a rake and some sort of noble, needs a social tutor/guide for his country cousin. He is impeded by both the cousin’s gauche behavior, and the young woman’s vulgar, grasping mother. He hires Alexandra Balfour, a genteel-y impoverished lady, to act as her governess; not because of sterling references or experience, but because he really wants to have sex with Alexandra, and he figures she can teach his cousin to be alluring to men as well and thus get the young woman off his hands and out of the house with alacrity. Lucien and Alexandra fall in love, he locks her in his basement (in a fun way) for reasons I cannot begin to remember, they get married, the end.

I feel behooved to mention that only in romance novels can a name like Lucien, or Sebastian, be ruggedly masculine, although, truth be told, I actually like the name Lucien. Not enough to burden a child with it, but certainly well enough to aggrandize a cat, if I weren’t violently allergic to them, which I am.

Meet Me at Midnight

The woman’s 1987 prom dress appears to be sliding off her body.

I almost always like romance novels when they get married at the beginning. This is one of those.

Victoria Fontaine, nicknamed Vixen, is beautiful (Regency Elizabeth Taylor), bright, and vivacious. Tired of her “my eyes are up here” life, she’s a hoyden whose parents don’t know what to do with her; fortunately, she gets caught making out with her new acquaintance, Sinclair, Marquess Althorpe, at a party in Chapter One. Victoria’s parents know an out when they see one, so they insist these two gorgeous, sexy people marry right away.

Sinclair, nicknamed Sin, louche by all appearances, is the standard indolent-younger-son-who-was-never-supposed-to-inherit-and-now-has-to-make-good. Lucien (Kevin Sorbo up there) was in the same position. Sin has recently returned from a life of endless indulgence on the continent, but he was really a spy, of course. Victoria figures it all out pretty quickly and sets out to help him with the maguffin-y sub-plot.

Speaking of sub-plots, Vixen has a menagerie of animals that she brings to Sinclair’s house with her. Animals that, once again, are you listening romance novel authors?,cannot be house-trained. Plus there’s a parrot that repeats what was said during love scenes. It’s kind of charming, but also kind of COME ON! PARROTS DON’T LEARN PHRASES THAT QUICKLY!

Regardless of the bluebirds on her shoulder, Victoria and Sinclair are rather delightful together, and I enjoyed their jaunt to a happy ending. There were moments of genuine humour and Enoch did a good job at the falling in love narrative. I didn’t even mind their nicknames, Vixen and Sin, since they represent the personas they had hi— RECORD NEEDLE SCRATCH!

I just discovered that there is a third book in this series, A Matter of Scandal, and I scooped that sucker up on Amazon for $1.99 in 1.3 seconds flat. There will now be an indeterminate delay while I read the book and add it to this review.

[Muzac version of The Girl from Ipanema]

I’m about a third of the way through. So far, so good. Great banter, good chemistry. Funny.

Greydon Bsomething, Duke of Wycliffe is helping his uncle reorganize his finances and the first step was a huge and long overdue rent increase for all of his tenants. That’s endearing. The lovely redhead, Emma Grenville, who owns and runs the finishing school on the estate is displeased, to say the least, so she and the Duke enter into a wager to prevent the increase. She has to come up with a better plan than the Duke’s to fix his uncle’s finances. He has to teach a class at her school for some reason. Translation: They have to spend a lot of time together.

Wycliffe is gorgeous (natch), large (obvs), thinks all women are trying to ensnare him ( ’cause, you know, Duke), and is magnetically drawn (of course) to the bluestocking who doesn’t give a toss about any of it, except his dismissal of her school and efforts (natch). Apparently, the best way to improve someone’s opinion of women is to make him spend extended periods of time with a group of teenage girls. Has the author ever met a teenage girl?

Wycliffe is annoyingly arrogant so far. I’m hoping he’ll be taken down SEVERAL pegs.

[Muzak resumes]

There is a hilarious moment when Emma is giving Grey what for at a dinner party and his entire response is to silently wish everyone else would go away so he can enjoy her insults without interruption.

[Muzak transitions to We’ve Only Just Begun]

A Matter of Scandal

Why is Clint Eastwood pushing her into that rose bush?

Well, that was Enoch’s best effort: very funny, great chemistry, a romp; and once again, it was lacking something I can’t quite put my finger on. Do the leads need to talk to each other more? Talk to each other differently? Is there only sexual chemistry and no intellectual connection and therefore although that part works, it doesn’t go deeper? Is it something about the intimacy? Blargh!

I discovered another book in the series, The Rake, but it’s $7.59 on Amazon, so this won’t be happening any time soon:

Pity.

Also by Suzanne Enoch
The Rake (Tristan/Georgiana)
England’s Perfect Hero (Robert/Lucinda)
The Devil Wears Kilts (Ranulf/Charlotte)

Links to my other reviews can be found on my complete reading list of books sorted by author or Author Commentary & The Tallies Shameful.

One Good Earl Deserves a Lover by Sarah MacLean

book review February 19, 2013 Leave a comment

Girl meets boy. Girl asks boy to ruin her. Boy refuses. Boy gives in.

I’ve read about 140 romance novels in the past year, and attempted another two or three dozen. I feel depressingly confident in saying that I’ve read all the good ones. At least, all the good ones that I can get my hands on, as I am unwilling to pay $7.99 each to purchase an author’s out of print backlog as it spills into Amazon’s Kindle stock. This means I do a lot of three things:

Wait for the good authors to release new books.
Take a chance on new authors on Amazon.
Try random library books with titles like: If You Give a Girl a Viscount Sex and the Single Earl Cloudy with a Chance of Marriage

Between the awful titles and covers, the publishers really do manage to convey what they think of their extremely profitable readership. This book has an awful title, too. I don’t blame the author. I’m sure she would have preferred something less excruciating.

One Good Earl Deserves a Lover is the second book in Sarah MacLean’s Regency Rule of Scoundrels series. Each book features one of four displaced lords who run a notorious, and therefore extremely fashionable and popular, gaming club called The Fallen Angel. The first book, A Rogue By Any Other Name, introduced the gentlemen, and told Bourne and Penelope’s story. That book was good, but the hero suffered from a prolonged case of Head Up Posterior. This book is much better, lovely in fact. It picks up exactly where the Epilogue of the last book left off. I love it when they do that!

Pippa Marbury is getting married in two weeks. She is a woman of insatiable intellectual curiosity and as such is extremely inquisitive about what to expect on her wedding night. Instead of doing the logical thing and throwing herself at her very nice, very boring fiance, she approaches a notorious rake to provide the “ruination” she seeks; however, Cross is not actually the roue he appears to be, so he naturally/correctly/wisely refuses Pippa’s request, but he doesn’t really want to. Hijinks ensue.

Cross (Jasper, Earl Something) is likeable, fiercely intelligent, and kind, a quietly tortured hero. He’s also a redhead which is extraordinarily unusual for heroes in the genre; what’s more, he’s tall and he gangles (H/T Douglas Adams). The men in these books are never short, but at 6’6″ Cross, dwarves Pippa. I’ve complained about the practicalities of height differences before. These are details that occur to me while reading romance novels and break my otherwise extraordinarily willing suspension of disbelief. What does absurdly tall Cross do when he wants to kiss Pippa? He picks her up, they both sit down, he kneels in front of her. Not in swooping romantic gestures, but simply as a practicality. It’s small details like this that make Sarah MacLean the writer she is and put her on my autobuy list. I’m so grateful for the effort to keep things logical.

Pippa is bespectacled and bookish. She’s odd. An intellectual at a time when such efforts would have been barred to her, she’s also rich and has disinterested parents, and thus free to follow her scientific interests. I don’t normally latch on to the heroines as much as the heroes, but I loved Pippa and related to her strongly. Her insistent uniqueness was really endearing. Pippa knows she’s unusual, she always has been, and while she doesn’t necessarily like it, she embraces it as who she is. In my family, speaking in a clever and complicated way is seen as a game. As a result, I tend to sound like a Gilmore Girl by way of Katharine Hepburn. It’s not a good thing. It’s a thing I was mocked for as a child and a thing that I still constantly try to temper in my everyday life: Don’t be too clever, don’t use words people might not know, don’t be too enthusiastic, don’t talk too quickly, don’t use references. I loved Pippa for being herself in a way I don’t often feel I’m allowed to be. Defiantly so. Defiantly curious, defiantly intellectual, defiantly demanding what she wants and needs, and being rewarded for it with a lovely man who genuinely understands, cares for, and delights in her.

And now I can go read Malin’s review of this book and see if we agree. We usually do.

The Revenge of Lord Eberlin by Julia London

book review January 15, 2013 Leave a comment

Almost completely joyless. This will be my only Julia London book.

I selected this novel randomly from the romance spinner at the library, read a few pages, shrugged, and decided to give it a go. The Revenge of Lord Eberlin feels like a romance novel from the early days, i.e. the 1970s/1980s. For the uninitiated, that means that the hero is a gorgeous, but cynical, brooding bastard who treats the heroine abominably, and the heroine is nonetheless magnetically attracted to him. His sole redeeming trait for most of the book is that he is nice to children. His only sympathetic quality, I think that was the author’s intent, is that he has panic attacks and since it is 1808 he has no idea what is going on and they terrify him. Julia London is a decent writer, sentences like “her heart was beating like the wings of a thousand birds” not withstanding, but this book was not engaging and, frankly, I’ve seen the revenge plot (the clue is in the title) done better by Julie Anne Long and Courtney Milan.

When Lord Eberlin, once Tobin Scott, was 13, his carpenter father was hanged for stealing jewels from the Ashwood estate. Central to the case was the testimony of Lord and Lady Ashwood’s adopted eight year old daughter, Lily Boudine. She saw Mr. Scott senior riding away from the manor on the night of the theft. Scott’s family was destroyed by the scandal: his mother and brother died in penury, and Tobin helped place his sister in service before he went to work on merchant ships. Fifteen years later, having purchased a title and clawed his way to wealth as an arms dealer (how revolting), Lord Eberlin has come back to destroy the Ashwood family, its finances, the estate, and anything else that isn’t nailed down. He’s really very grumpy. He has a charming friend named Mackenzie who might actually make for a fun book, but his appearance was disappointingly brief.

Lily and Tobin played together as children; more accurately, Lady Ashwood and Mr. Scott senior asked Tobin to occupy Lily while “work” was being done at the manor. Now Lady Ashwood in her own right, Lily is a smart, patient, and preternaturally mature and understanding young woman. She also has a young ward who appears now and then to be winsome and prove hero isn’t a complete ass. Tobin wants revenge, but he is drawn to Lily. She wants to protect her land and dependents, but is drawn to the foxy rude man who turns her crank even as he takes her livelihood.

The proposal was charming, but this book was no fun; more importantly it was essentially humourless. The tone was so serious that I started to wonder if the problem was me. Was I in a bad mood? Was I misreading the tone? Was I projecting emotions onto the story? Mostly, it was disappointment. I need to find a new romance writer’s catalogue to march through and with every new book I’m hoping I’ve found her. London used the word “visceral” on page three, so I had high hopes, but it was not to be.

The (Shameful) Tally 2013 – Ongoing

Things That Occur to Me While Reading Historical Romance Novels – Ongoing

Mrs. Julien Presents